Tell me ladies, have you ever had a badass no-nonsense girl friend?

You know the type who is raw, real, and tells it like it is without a care for your feelings because she knows the truth wrapped in love is all you need?

She’s the sassy, feisty and in yo’ face girl next door.

You love her, but sometimes you hate her because her exceptionally close relationship with honesty can be annoying af.

You know what I’m talking about?

Have you had a bestie like that in your life?

…No? You haven’t?

Well my loves, you most certainly MUST get yourself one in the shape of this book right here!

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P.S. Before we dive in, don’t forget to grab your FREE GIFT of 99 Timeless Books right here…

Now, let’s go…

The brilliant NYT bestselling author, success coach, and motivational speaker, Jen Sincero, is the sassy, feisty, no-nonsense, realest of the real, girlfriend that you need in your life RIGHT NOW!

In this Bible of truths, “You Are A Badass” is her notoriously-infamous, “sit-down chat” with us ladies who dare to dream of becoming more than we have ever been and strive to be all that we can possibly ever be.

When I just began my journey as a coach (whilst also dealing with a failing relationship…smh), nearly 2 years ago, I really felt like I had no clue what I was getting myself into. I felt like a sham. A fraud. A phony. How could I possibly inspire other women to become badasses within themselves when I didn’t have a clue how to be one for myself.

So one day, in true book worm fashion I stepped into a bookstore to find a book that would help me puff my chest and lift my head as I confidently navigated this world of online coaching.

Almost as if it were meant to be, I saw this bright yellow book with its sassy title staring at me, and after a couple flips through the pages I instinctively felt like this book wanted me to give it a home. So “You Are A Badass” is what I chose.

Or dare I say, it chose me!

If you saw my book you’d think I was studying for an exam! It’s covered in underlined paragraphs and there is barely any marginal space that is free of writing because there is just so much juicy wisdom to be found on every page.

Once it was read, I felt like I was overflowing with so many life truths, so much reassurance, so many awesome quotable reminders, and so much girl boss confidence.

So I’m sharing with you the 7 goldmine takeaways (believe me, choosing JUST 7 was a serious headache!) that blew my mind with so many “duuhhhh…” and head-nodding moments that closed the mental gap between who I was and who I wanted future Shari to be.

See if you find your future self within these words.

TOP 7 BADASS TAKEAWAYS

1. Appreciate How Special You Are

This takeaway has got to be number one because I feel like it is the most important.

Us gals don’t usually (read: never) appreciate ourselves as we should. We’re quicker to judge, condemn, settle for less and look down upon ourselves than to embrace and show off our gifts, talents and skills with boldness and bravery.

I for sure know that when I picked up this book, that’s exactly where I was at!

However, Coach Jen wisely reminds us that we are immensely unique. We are fearfully and wonderfully made. There is absolutely no one else like us on God’s green earth – and we absolutely must appreciate that fact. No one can use our gifts, talents, skills, personality traits, or intellect the way that we can.

No one has the ability to process our thoughts the way we can, see the world through our eyes the way we perceive the world, or express themselves exactly like us.

Isn’t that amazing?!

We are each so special. So unique. So different. And that ought to be cherished. Not seen as a disability or disadvantage.

As such, we have the power within ourselves to create our own unique worlds, pave our own unique paths, and live life according to our own unique beliefs, choices and decisions.

Each of us is a one-of-a-kind diamond – let’s never forget that!

“You are the only you that will ever be. You are kind of a big deal”

Jen Sincero

RELATED READ: The Top 4 Simple Secrets to Stop Caring About What Others Think (Especially When You Have a Big Dream)

2. Do Things You Love

When you find yourself swimming deep in the basic af, humdrum, auto-pilot monotony of life, chances are that you’re doing waaayyy too much of what you think you should do, and not enough of what you want to do.

As a woman that can look like a billion and one things – amiright?!

Examples include: being a final year student who’s burning the midnight oil for a degree you’re not sure you love or would even use.

Or maybe you’re an over-stressed corporate professional spending way too many hours in boardrooms, making deals, boosting up your performance to score that promotion, or simply striving to keep your boss happy on a day to day basis so he won’t fire you – and as a result you keep missing your fave yoga class and your hips are starting to show it. Yikes!

Or, you’re a single mom who has to juggle literally everything in life, and let’s not forget your car just broke down, so focusing on keeping things afloat is your jam right now.

The examples are endless!

I for one am completely guilty of this because I have a terrible case of tunnel vision at times – I have the potential to get so stuck into a way of life that I can’t see anything else and also deprive myself of other things that I enjoy, almost because I feel like I have to sacrifice them, e.g. hanging out or scheduling weekly phone conversations with friends.

However, Coach Jen warns us to stop with constantly depriving ourselves of the things that make us feel most alive.

She calls it letting ourselves down.

Instead, regardless of focusing primarily on the steady railway train of busy-ness that is our lives, we ought to make a conscious, proactive effort to upgrade our levels of joy and happiness however and how much we can.

Whilst we’re still breathing and fully functional we deserve to design a life that we enjoy, amidst the regularly scheduled programming of our lives, and that can take many forms. Here are some examples:

-Prioritise your needs first

-Join a gym

-Have a self-care day

-Spend the weekend at a hotel

-Take that romantic getaway to Brazil

-Go to that yoga retreat in Bali

-Dance the night away at a concert

-Go to the movies

Choose what makes you feel alive, and then go do it, especially if you want a life that you actually enjoy.

“We’re all busy, but it’s the people who make enjoying their lives a priority who, um, enjoy their lives.”

Jen Sincero

3. Take the First Right Step

Another thing us gals fall prey to is that infamous practice of perfection.

Some of us don’t move a finger forward until we know that all our ducks are in a row, and the pieces to the puzzle fit seamlessly together *raises hand*. 

We live in our heads.

We overthink.

And overthink some more (#guilty).

We research. We ask questions. We investigate. But we never put the wheels in motion or take action immediately after.

Many of us live for years in that seemingly never-ending cycle of “all talk / no action” on our biggest aspirations; simply because we’re afraid of what happens if we do act.

We’re afraid to fail. Afraid to succeed. Afraid of what other people will think. Afraid of looking foolish. Afraid of what it will do to our relationships. And the list of fears goes on…

However, the almighty Jen is a complete supporter of the action-takers. She wisely suggests for us to just take messy, imperfect action into the direction that simply feels good. Instead of wasting time living in perfection-ville where we’re not doing a thing because we’re too busy thinking about what to do, all we should focus on is taking purposeful, calculated leaps of faith according to what feels right in our gut.

As we take action, and see where the journey takes us, suddenly the hidden opportunities reveal themselves to us. As we continue, more and more breadcrumbs will fall to the floor for us to follow, as we learn to listen to, and trust our instincts.

The best thing we can do for ourselves as we pursue or aspirations is to step forward in the direction of what feels right, and see where it goes. Better to do that scared, than to stand uncomfortably still as a statue as time (and our goals) passes us by.

Once the momentum starts to build, there’s no guessing how far and how fast we can go.

So whatever we want to do, it’s time for us to get started NOW!

“most answers reveal themselves through doing, not thinking”

Jen Sincero

READ MORE: The Top 10 Poisonous Habits High Achievers Avoid For Matchless Self-Confidence (And You Should To)

4. Follow Your Fantasies

Now, we know that today’s socio-economic landscape is changing at a very fast pace, however, some of us were told by our parents and grandparents to find a practical job we can settle into for 40 years.

Me included.

Find yourself a safe, productive job that pays the bills and keeps you occupied, is what they said.

We were taught how to survive.

Not how to thrive.

We were not taught that another viable option was to also follow our fantasies, probably because the number of people who can actually live off of their fantasies is so minimal.

But just for a minute, think about this – in an ideal world, which fantasies would you follow if you knew you wouldn’t fail and money wasn’t an issue?

Being a financially-comfortable stay at home mom so you can take care of your children? Becoming a motivational speaker who inspires the lives of millions? Visiting every country of the world and documenting it on you blog or YouTube channel? Make-up artistry? Dance? An Olympic sport?

How would following these fantasies make you feel?

The almighty Jen reveals that our fantasies are actually “our realities in an excuse-free world”.

Instead of beeline focus on survival, we ought to leave our shame, excuses and “stories” behind so we can play full out and do the things we’re most excited about or most long for.

By following our fantasies we would actually be living.

“Our fantasies are the most revealing peepholes into who we are and what we think is awesome. No matter how out-there and ridiculous they may seem, they mean something to us, and usually represent our biggest and best versions of ourselves”

Jen Sincero

5. Surround Yourself with People Who Think the Way You Want to Think

What does your tribe look like right now? Is it a tasteless blend of pessimists, whiners, victims, and think-inside-the-box-ers? Or are you surrounded by a healthy group of well-wishers, supporters, action-takers and big thinkers?

If you’re surrounded by people who make it difficult for you to grow into the woman you desire to become, it will always be an upward battle to maintain a strong level of confidence, positivity, optimism, faith and hope that what you want you will create.

As such, Lady Jen explicitly advises us to go out and make some new friends if our current ones are crappy and toxic.

We ought to stay as far away as possible from small-minded, small-thinking people who have no clue how to utilise their brains for housing big dreams and big visions.

Instead, people who are greater than us, more successful than us, with the lives and lifestyles that we want, who take action on their dreams, are allergic to the word “impossible” and are making a positive impact on the world – these should be our homies!

So, girlies, make a list of the different types of people you want to meet, get as specific as possible about who they are, find out where those types of people love to hang out, put on your best ‘knock-em-dead’ outfit, get out there, and shake some hands.

One thing I learned over the past 2 years is that you can only benefit from inserting yourself into the crowds you want to belong to, and spending less time with those who make it difficult for you to grow.

“being around inspired, visionary, enthusiastic people who are living their truths is one of the fastest ways to massively transform your life”

Jen Sincero

6. View Fear from Your Rear View Mirror

One thing I’ve noticed as well, being a coach, is that we have been conditioned to play it safe, play it small, take no risks, be careful, and try not to get dirty or bruised.

As such, many times we live in fear of the possibility of anything taking us out of our comfort zones. We’re gripped and paralysed by the fear of the unknown.

However, Lady Jen rightly states that fear lives in the future, and the only way to reverse our feelings of fear is to have faith!

Have faith in the future

Have faith in the unknown

Have faith in yourself

We gals ought to change our mindset if we want to kick fear in the butt. Instead of being terrified of the unknown and what’s to come, we must learn to become more comfortable swimming in unknown waters and embracing the thrill of it.

One way of doing that is by viewing your fear through a futuristic lens.

Think about your current challenges and see them from the future. Pretend you’re looking back on them in victory and triumph. See yourself defeating each one of your obstacles and how awesome that makes you feel.

Much like how you feel now when you can look back on a problem you had maybe yesterday or even 5 years ago. Nothing lasts forever. And most times when you look back on an issue, you think to yourself “oh that?! I was terrified but it turns out that it wasn’t so scary after all!”

Once you can change your perspective on your current obstacles and view your challenges with futuristic eyes, they will loosen that powerful fearful grip they have on you that make you feel stuck and unable to move forward.

“on the other side of your fear is your freedom”

Jen Sincero

READ NEXT: Everything You Need to Know About Setting Higher Standards For Your Life (And Living Up To Them)

7. The Only Failure is in Quitting

One thing that Coach Jen stresses is that once you’re on this journey of life, once you haven’t thrown in the towel, you are merely gathering information on your way to where you need to be.

With admirable examples of great and influential minds such as Thomas Edison, Steven Spielberg and Fred Smith, she reveals to us that each one of them had obstacles in the way and every single sign that suggested they should never go after their dreams.

However, what makes them different is that they didn’t give up. They never quit on themselves. They believed in their big visions so much that they refused to let situations, circumstances or people get in the way.

Which is so powerful!

So ladies, in my last takeaway, I leave you with this reminder that whatever you want to achieve, IF you want it bad enough, as bad as you need oxygen to breathe, and you make a firm resolute decision in your mind that that achievement is yours for the taking, there’s absolutely no way that you can’t get it.

Even if it feels a million miles away right now.

You can get it!

So decide on what you want and how badly you want it, put the excuses to bed, and go to town on becoming the ideal person worthy of the manifestation of your dream.

“the only failure is quitting. Everything else is just gathering information”

Jen Sincero

Aaandd…there you have it – my top 7 takeaways!

But honestly guys, these 7 takeaways are just a snippet of all the goodness oozing out of this book.

This was just a teaser.

If I wrote anymore, without exaggeration this post might be 10 minutes long!

Nevertheless, since I could not help myself, you can also find below some of my favourite words to live by, from this masterpiece.

Meditate on these bad boys!

Words to Live By

You are responsible for what you say and do. You are not responsible for whether or not people freak out about it

Figure it out. Don’t just hand your life over to your circumstances like a little wuss. You can take your life wherever you want it to go, so grab it by its nether regions and make doing the things you love a priority

When you love yourself enough to stand in your truth no matter what the cost, everyone benefits. You start attracting the kinds of things, people, and opportunities, that are in alignment with who you truly are

Having money is not only a blessing, it’s a responsibility

Faith is the muscle you use when you decide to blast outside of your comfort zone and transform your life into something that’s practically unrecognizable to you in your present reality. Faith smothers your fear of the unknown. Faith allows you to take risks. Faith is the stuff of ‘leap and the net will appear’

It’s about having the cojones to show up as the brightest, happiest, badassiest version of yourself, whatever that looks like to you.

All you have to do is make the choice to let go of everything you’re so attached to that’s not serving you and manifest the reality that you want. Life is an illusion created by your perception, and it can be changed the moment you choose to change it

Over to You

I highly recommend this book for any woman who is faced with immense doubt and insecurity, but still wants to rise above her current situation or circumstances.

If that woman is you, getting this book into your hands and into your heart will be a major first step in the right direction. You can grab it right here!

What are your thoughts on the top 7 takeaways – any favourites?

Have you read You Are A Badass before?

What were your key takeaways?

Share your thoughts in the comments!

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